Scoliosis is a Beast!

Christina and I have been getting our backs and necks adjusted for the past several weeks by a man here on the mission base.  He’s an FSM student and though he’s not a licensed Chiropractor in the US, he’s licensed in Korea.  He has worked WONDERS on my back.  The bummer is that he thinks I have a little bit of scoliosis.  Because of it my ribs are slightly twisted.  Sounds very interesting, I know.  The problem is that he’s had finals the last couple weeks and we haven’t been able to go.  My neck has been killing me the last two weeks.  I can feel where things are out of place and today it’s been an absolute beast.  Sending pain all up my neck and head.  I’ve got a bugger of a headache and have since about 6 pm.  bleh.

Onto better news, I had my first “official” meeting with The Call Mobilization team.  I was surprised, though I’m not sure why, that Dwayne Roberts is going to be in the Thursday meeting.  I had my own private giggle (as morbid as this sounds) when he realized his glasses had cut his nose and was bleeding.  Not because he was bleeding but because, from where I was sitting, the blood looked like a weird part of the glasses and I’d spend the better part of five minutes wondering why someone would make glasses like that and why he’d buy them. 

I’m excited to be on that team.  I didn’t know Sarah Kim and Isaac Amabile’s Dad were part of it.  Thus far I’m most pleased with the dry humor of most of the people who sat in that room today.  I laughed more than I expected.  And I’m interested to see where this is going to go.  Right now I feel like the assignments I’ve been given are a little over my head but mostly because I don’t understand them fully. 

 Mostly….I’m just excited. 

 Also, as a side note, a lady came over and told me that I had just made her the best latte she’s ever had.  Two days in a row someone I’ve never met has made my day with a simple compliment.

I still miss my friend.

Enough to Be Happy

I’ve always known that little things make me happy.  Don’t get me wrong, because of Nicholas I have enjoyed extravegance as well.  But it doesn’t have to be expensive of huge to make me happy.  This week has been a much needed exploit on the little things that make me smile. 

 For instance…since the weather has turned nicer I’ve found more than just a few excuses to be out in the sun and…BLOWING BUBBLES!!  Between Nicholas, Jacob, Mary and myself, I have enough bubbles to make an orphanage happy however I’ll admit that I’ve spent my share of the benji’s at Walmart since their Bubble wands came out in bigger sizes.  It makes something inside lift just a little (and sometimes a lot) when I get to just stand in the sun and watch them float away. 

Two days ago Christina and I took Sophie and Jack Roberts to see Horton Hears a Who.  It was delightful, despite the “You’re a boob” comments in the movie that we were terrified they’d go home and repeat.  They laughed and just sat there rivited the whole time.  It’s been a while since I’ve been able to spend so much time with a six and seven year old.  Sophie’s constant smile could brighten anyone’s day. We took them to TCBY afterwards to get frozen yogurt.  The pictures of them holding cones that are as big as their faces are priceless. 

 After helping a customer in line tonight, he said, “By the way. You’re really pretty.  Just wanted to let you know.” And then walked away.  My first response after saying thank you was to comment to Christie that maybe he was an overaged boyscout who needed a good deed for the day.  But I went back to her and apologized later for being so mean to myself.  It’s just out of my own selfconsciousness of being afraid someone wouldn’t agree so if I say something against it first, they can’t.  But to be honest, it felt really nice.  He wasn’t someone I know and I appreciate the fact that he was willing to brighten my day.  Whoever you were, thanks friend. 

 And I’m ok with letting little things make me happy.  To be honest, I need all the joy I can get right now! >_<  I miss Nick.  It rips at my heart.  Especially at night.  But I know that God is in control and He desires for Nicholas to know Him more than I do.  I know that he’s safer left to God than he was when we were friends.  But I miss having my best friend. 

And I like that there’s a part of me that refuses to grow up.  I hope that never changes.  I enjoy delighting in juvenile tendencies. 

3.26.08

Where to even begin?  Things have happened so quickly!

 I have just joined a team of people to mobilize The Call DC and The Call San Diego.  It literally fell into my lap and though I have a slight bit of nervousness reguarding my ability to discipline myself and keep things in their proper place, I am excited.  In the midst of so much turmoil and pain in my heart I’m beginning to feel hope.  It means I have to stop going to bed at 3 a.m. and fully let go of the Night Watch schedule because I’m having to get up at 8 or 9 to make meetings, etc.  But it’s really good for me.  As much as I’m lingering in the night, getting up this early makes me so much more productive. 

As it stands right now I’m going to continue to Shift Lead at the coffee shop.  Dennis is worried I won’t be able to handle the work load of both.  I think I can.  We’ll see.  For now my assignment is to get a list compiled of all the High Schools and Colleges in the nation so we can begin to connect with them and eventually have a point person at each to communicate with about The Call. 

 Jesus, You are good. 

I Want To Choose Love

I’ve been reading this fictitious book called The Fall of Lucifer, by Wendy Alec.  I can’t begin to explain the things it is opening in my heart.  For the first time I feel I’ve connected with the fact that God chose us.  Me.  He had the angels.  He had the Trinity.  But He chose to make us in His image, with His DNA, and give us access to His throne.  What a mind blowing concept.  The Almighty loved me.  Carefully knit me together to reflect Him.  Then gave me the ability to choose to love Him. 

It’s changed my view (at least today) on every decision I make.  Each choice is about love.  Will I choose to love Him or choose to hate Him in my decision?  And ultimately each choice that ends in pride or selfishness not only feeds my hate for God but my hate for myself.  To love Him brings life and freedom.  So hate Him brings death and bondage.  That truly makes every decision (I’m not talking about what to eat for dinner) life or death.  Which is….huge.  Therefore eliminating “little” sin. 

It  changes my thought on being good as well.  I have heard and have even taught that Christianity is not about rules and walls.  We obey through love.  Out of our love.  But even that has never penetrated my heart like today.  We obey because we truly love Him.  Choosing to align our thoughts or actions or words with Christ is choosing love.  Choosing not to is choosing hate.   

The funny this is that Misty was singing about it on stage an hour ago.  I was sitting here finalizing the cash trays listening to her sing “There’s a war on the inside.  It’s the arena to demonstrate my love for you” Which I’ve heard her sing hundreds of times by now.  But tonight she was following it with “Every time I choose righteousness.  That’s love.  Every time I choose humility.  That’s love.  Every time I choose Your ways over the desires of my flesh.  You say, ‘The one who loves me is the one who keeps my commands.’ I want to choose love”

 And I ache over those I love who don’t.